Letting Go

Two friends of mine are about to do what I did half a year ago: downsize to a smaller living space. Because they consider me to now be an expert, they enlisted my help in letting go of more than half of their clothing, shoes, handbags, and accessories.

Elaine’s story: She had twelve pairs of jeans in a variety of styles and sizes. I suggested that she identify the ones that currently fit. There were three. The others were too small. “Let’s put the too-small ones in the Donate Box,” I suggested. “Oh, no! I have to keep at least some of these. For when I lose weight.” “But in your new place, will you have storage space for clothes that don’t fit?” She realized that this isn’t just about the jeans, but about all the other categories of stuff that she simply had no room for. She became anguished and resistant.

This struggle went on all afternoon.  I just know that she’s going to sneak back some of the things that she reluctantly put in the Donate Box. Then she will move too much stuff into a too small space and will have yet another challenge.

Barbara’s story: Barbara was in the perfect frame of mind to purge, purge, purge. She was ready to get rid of the old, the unused, the superfluous. She eagerly embraced three important questions: Do you love it? Do you need it? Do you use it? Given those clear guidelines, it was easy for her to categorize everything into one of two boxes: Keep or Donate. At one point, I said, “Hold on now. Are you sure you want to give away this Hermes scarf that I’ve seen you wear dozens of times, and that brings you lots of compliments?” She said, “Oh, no! What was I thinking? I’m getting carried away.”

That is the tale of two women in the process of letting go. Where do you fit in?

Pam Chambers is a corporate trainer and motivational speaker. Learn about her services at http://www.pamchambers.com.

E-mail: SpeakOut@pamchambers.com